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Sacrifice those you love and the life you lived to bring forth the life you want.
If you were to look into my past, you would see a blank slate. I remember the life I once lived, but to everyone else it never existed. That is the price I paid to live my dream life.
“Okay, class, let’s begin on page 30. Fuji-san, if you’d please pick up.”
I went to class like everyone else. No one really paid attention to me. After all, the man known as my father became rich through anime and manga. I don’t really know the man that is now my father since he is always away because of work, and apparently my mother died when I was three. I do not know any of this from personal experience. It is just how my life was chosen.
After school was spent at home. I never went to any clubs. I do not know why, but for some reason I never felt the urge to join one. I felt as if I had come here for a different reason.
“How was school?”
I look at Rima-san, the woman in charge of my care. She is supposed to substitute for both parents. Do not ask how my father came up with this idea. I would be unable to tell you.
“It was fine,” I say with a shrug. “I’m going to take a bath.”
“Okay. The water is already warm.”
“Thank you.”
I deposit my belongings in my bedroom and grab my bath stuff. I soak in the tub, allowing my mind to drift into serenity. I see two young girls laughing and talking loudly. I also see a large man talking to a woman who is similar to my appearance. Finally, I see an older girl in a wheelchair, smiling and holding out her arms as if for a hug.
This is what my family would be like if I had not left them for this world...
Why had I left them? I do not recall, honestly. But I feel as if I will remember one day. I just have to wait long enough.
After my bath, I slip on red silk pajamas and white slippers. I blow dry my hair and put it up into a bun. I then proceed to my bedroom to complete my homework. There is never that much.
Once I complete my homework, I spend the remaining time watching anime and playing video games. About an hour after I start on a game, the phone rings. I pause the game and listen to the conversation.
“Yes, Yamamoto-san. I understand, sir. Yes, I’m sure she will be very pleased to meet him.”
What were they talking about? I already figured it had to do with picking a suitable husband for me. Most of the times they had tried, the boy chickened out. I don’t understand what’s so bad about an otaku.
Rima-san does not bring up the conversation. So, I ignore it. I eat dinner and then proceed to bed. As far as Rima-san is concerned, at least. I really slip on a pair of jeans and a gray T-shirt. After putting my feet into a pair of lace-less tennis shoes, I sneak onto the balcony of my bedroom and climb down the rope ladder I positioned over the garden. After climbing out, I make my way down the street. It’s nice to be out of my house. I know I used to hate it back in my past life, but now that I am a prisoner in my house, I enjoy being outside.
I walk on for a while. The sun is still high by time I reach the super market. I enjoy going here. I often buy small snacks. Once inside, however, I end up bumping into a red-haired guy from my school. In fact, he’s in my class.
“I’m sorry,” I say politely. “I should have been more careful.”
“It’s fine,” he says as he stoops to help pick up my items.
Once all my items are back in my basket, I tilt my head as if in thought. “Why are you at the commoner’s supermarket, Hitachiin-san?”
“I felt like buying coffee,” he says simply. “Haruhi ran out.”
“Ah, Fujioka-san lives nearby? I never knew.”
“Yeah. Do you?”
“Not really. I walked quite a while.”
“Walk? Why not just get a ride?”
I smile and hold a finger to my lips. “Secret.”
I then walk to the checkout and purchase my items. Whichever twin that was, his brother couldn’t have been far behind. And while one alone may be nice, the two together are horrible.
“Yamamoto-san, I didn’t know you shopped here.”
I smile. “Fujioka-san, it’s nice to see you. I only shop here for treats. My father doesn’t really like them.”
“Well, it’s nice to know not all rich people have food ordered for them.”
“I actually hate it when that happens,” I admit. “I never know how the food looks until I purchase it.” I look at the setting sun. “Well, I should get back. I don’t want Rima-san to discover my absence.”
And so I run off. Who would have thought I’d run into two people from Ouran Academy at a commoner’s supermarket? I mean, I understand Fujioka-san since he’s a commoner, as I was before my arrival in this world, but Hitachiin-san’s presence can’t be normal.
-
The next day starts the same as ever. All my classes fly by, and I eat alone as usual. I buy my lunch, of course. My father does not allow me to pack my lunch as I had in my past life.
After school, one of the girls from my class approaches me.
“Why are you always alone, Yamamoto-san?” she asks.
I smile at her. “I don’t really do well when it comes to starting conversations,” I explain. “So, I don’t start friendships very well either.”
“Well, if you want friends, you should hang out with us sometime. We were about to visit a club, actually. Want to join us?”
“That depends on the club,” I reply simply.
“Ouran High School Host Club. It’s really a nice place.”
I feel something in my mind click, and before I can help it I say, “Yes. I’ll go.”
“Great. Let’s head there together. Ah, and you can call me Yasu-chan.”
“Well, Yasu-chan, you can call me Miyako-chan.”
“Okay, then it’s settled. I hope we become great friends.”
-
The club, it turns out, is the home of seven boys. These boys entertain girls as they come. Three of the boys are first years in my class. They are the Hitachiin twins and Fujioka-san. Two others are second years Kyoya Ootori-sempai and Tamaki Suoh-sempai. The final two are third years Takashi “Mori” Morinozuka-sempai and Mitsukini “Honey” Haninozuka-sempai.
“Let’s sit with the twins since I always visit them,” Yasu-chan says. “Though Tamaki-sempai is good for first-timers, I don’t think you’re the kind to enjoy much flirting. Am I right?”
“Yes, you are,” I admit. “I’m not the best with flirting.”
One of the twins talks about how he saw me at the commoner’s supermarket, and I carry on a conversation with him about why we were there. It turns out he is Koaru, who is actually said to be nicer. By time the club closes, I feel happier.
When I get home, I am greeted by an upset Rima-san. “Where were you, Miyako-sama?”
“I was at a club,” I say with a shrug. “A girl from my class wanted me to check it out.”
“Well, your father called. You have a half hour to change into something nice.”
“Why?”
“It does not matter. Just hurry up and dress.”
So, I do as I am told. I slip into a small black dress and strap on black heels. They always make me taller, which makes me happy since I have a height complex.
I step into the car, my red shoulder-bag in hand. I slip it on and step out of the car once we arrive at a fancy restaurant. We are shown to a table where my father sits with three other people. One is a boy with black hair and brown eyes, and the other two I figure to be his parents.
“Miyako, this is Takahashi Yukio,” my father explains.
“It’s nice to meet you,” I say as I take a seat.
“Same,” Takahashi-san says with a smile.
I look at my father. “So, what is the occasion?”
“The Takahashi family just sign on to partnering with my studio, so I figured we’d celebrate by treating them to dinner.” He smiles at me and whispers, “If all goes well, you will have yourself a fiance.”
“You mean Takahashi Yukio-san?” I ask, my voice also a whisper.
“Yes.”
This is hurtful. I hate the idea of arranged marriages. Even so, I behave myself. I am polite, but I can’t help but withdraw from conversation. They talk about things that bore me. I would much rather talk about video games and the characters of anime, not of business and the voice actors that would work best for an anime.
After dinner, my father seems thoroughly angry as he gets into a car and leaves. I get into the one I came in and look at Rima-san. “What did I do?”
“You were shy as ever,” she explains. “The Takahashi family said they are not interested in a wife who does not force her way into a conversation.”
I roll my eyes. “Whatever. I disliked the idea anyway.”
That night, I sleep with dreams of my old life. Without realizing it, I slip into serenity. My lovely home and large list of pets. My friends laughing around me as I sit down in class. This is serenity.
I am awoken rudely the next morning by Rima-san. “You were not waking up,” she says, worry in her voice. “I was about to call an ambulance.”
“Sorry,” I say as I start to get dressed. “I was having a good dream.”
She sighs and rolls her eyes. “Get to school.”
My class lacks life. One of the twins seems to be in a bad mood, and the other twin is trying hard to cheer him up. Even though we were grouped on projects with Fujioka-san often, I still am unable to tell the two apart. Oh well, nothing to be done. Instead, I decide to ask them.
“Hitachiin-san, is something the matter?” I ask. I feel butterflies in my stomach. I hate talking to people.
“It’s nothing,” he says coldly.
“I’m sorry, Yamamoto-san,” says the other twin. “Koaru’s been like this since we went to dinner last night. We can’t get him to cheer up.”
“Well, I hope you feel happy again,” I say to the grouchy twin. “I really enjoy seeing your smile around the classroom.”
At lunch I decide not to eat. Instead I walk out to the rose garden. Surprise. One of the twins are there.
“Which one are you?” I ask.
“Koaru,” he says simply.
“Ah, sorry. I wasn’t sure. Anyway, I’ll go somewhere else since you’re already here.”
I turn to leave only to have him grab my arm. “Wait, Yamamoto-san. I-I want to talk. Hikaru wouldn’t understand since he’s never been in love. Or at least, been in love and realized it.”
“Oh? Well, then talk away. I’m surprisingly good with advice.”
So he tells me of the girl he likes who he saw with another guy. It was obvious that the guy was up as a fiance option. The girl was participating in conversation and acting happy, and it made Koaru-san happy. But the thing was, he liked the girl and didn’t want to let the guy have her. He couldn’t get the courage to tell her, and he needed a girl’s advice since they were very confusing.
“Well, I think you should tell her that you saw her there,” I say. “And then ask if they ended up getting engaged. I mean, I was at dinner with a guy who was an option as my fiance. Even so, he rejected me.”
“He did?”
“Yeah. I’m not good at being social. I faked the beginning well enough, but I ended up drifting away near the end.”
A smile lights up his face. “I’m sorry, but that makes me happy.” He walks past me and back to school.
I sigh and shake my head. And then something hits me. “Hitachiin Koaru-san, do you like me?”
He freezes, shakes his head, and says, “Who knows?”
“But why else would you be happy that I got rejected? Only a completely heartless person would be happy unless they liked the person that got rejected.”
“I don’t know what to say to that idea,” he replies simply. “So,” he turns around and looks my directly in the eye, “I’ll do something.”
Then, before I can even blink, his lips are against mine. When he pulls apart, his eyes are filled with tears. “Don’t ever accept someone else.”
I feel my heart flutter, and I say with a smile, “Of course not.” And then I realize why it was I traded in my life. I remember that I had idolized the show and Koaru. He was the nicer twin and I found myself one of his many fans. Without realizing it, I had forgotten it and lived a life where I ignored him. I wouldn’t make that mistake again.
I have my new Serenity...
“Okay, class, let’s begin on page 30. Fuji-san, if you’d please pick up.”
I went to class like everyone else. No one really paid attention to me. After all, the man known as my father became rich through anime and manga. I don’t really know the man that is now my father since he is always away because of work, and apparently my mother died when I was three. I do not know any of this from personal experience. It is just how my life was chosen.
After school was spent at home. I never went to any clubs. I do not know why, but for some reason I never felt the urge to join one. I felt as if I had come here for a different reason.
“How was school?”
I look at Rima-san, the woman in charge of my care. She is supposed to substitute for both parents. Do not ask how my father came up with this idea. I would be unable to tell you.
“It was fine,” I say with a shrug. “I’m going to take a bath.”
“Okay. The water is already warm.”
“Thank you.”
I deposit my belongings in my bedroom and grab my bath stuff. I soak in the tub, allowing my mind to drift into serenity. I see two young girls laughing and talking loudly. I also see a large man talking to a woman who is similar to my appearance. Finally, I see an older girl in a wheelchair, smiling and holding out her arms as if for a hug.
This is what my family would be like if I had not left them for this world...
Why had I left them? I do not recall, honestly. But I feel as if I will remember one day. I just have to wait long enough.
After my bath, I slip on red silk pajamas and white slippers. I blow dry my hair and put it up into a bun. I then proceed to my bedroom to complete my homework. There is never that much.
Once I complete my homework, I spend the remaining time watching anime and playing video games. About an hour after I start on a game, the phone rings. I pause the game and listen to the conversation.
“Yes, Yamamoto-san. I understand, sir. Yes, I’m sure she will be very pleased to meet him.”
What were they talking about? I already figured it had to do with picking a suitable husband for me. Most of the times they had tried, the boy chickened out. I don’t understand what’s so bad about an otaku.
Rima-san does not bring up the conversation. So, I ignore it. I eat dinner and then proceed to bed. As far as Rima-san is concerned, at least. I really slip on a pair of jeans and a gray T-shirt. After putting my feet into a pair of lace-less tennis shoes, I sneak onto the balcony of my bedroom and climb down the rope ladder I positioned over the garden. After climbing out, I make my way down the street. It’s nice to be out of my house. I know I used to hate it back in my past life, but now that I am a prisoner in my house, I enjoy being outside.
I walk on for a while. The sun is still high by time I reach the super market. I enjoy going here. I often buy small snacks. Once inside, however, I end up bumping into a red-haired guy from my school. In fact, he’s in my class.
“I’m sorry,” I say politely. “I should have been more careful.”
“It’s fine,” he says as he stoops to help pick up my items.
Once all my items are back in my basket, I tilt my head as if in thought. “Why are you at the commoner’s supermarket, Hitachiin-san?”
“I felt like buying coffee,” he says simply. “Haruhi ran out.”
“Ah, Fujioka-san lives nearby? I never knew.”
“Yeah. Do you?”
“Not really. I walked quite a while.”
“Walk? Why not just get a ride?”
I smile and hold a finger to my lips. “Secret.”
I then walk to the checkout and purchase my items. Whichever twin that was, his brother couldn’t have been far behind. And while one alone may be nice, the two together are horrible.
“Yamamoto-san, I didn’t know you shopped here.”
I smile. “Fujioka-san, it’s nice to see you. I only shop here for treats. My father doesn’t really like them.”
“Well, it’s nice to know not all rich people have food ordered for them.”
“I actually hate it when that happens,” I admit. “I never know how the food looks until I purchase it.” I look at the setting sun. “Well, I should get back. I don’t want Rima-san to discover my absence.”
And so I run off. Who would have thought I’d run into two people from Ouran Academy at a commoner’s supermarket? I mean, I understand Fujioka-san since he’s a commoner, as I was before my arrival in this world, but Hitachiin-san’s presence can’t be normal.
-
The next day starts the same as ever. All my classes fly by, and I eat alone as usual. I buy my lunch, of course. My father does not allow me to pack my lunch as I had in my past life.
After school, one of the girls from my class approaches me.
“Why are you always alone, Yamamoto-san?” she asks.
I smile at her. “I don’t really do well when it comes to starting conversations,” I explain. “So, I don’t start friendships very well either.”
“Well, if you want friends, you should hang out with us sometime. We were about to visit a club, actually. Want to join us?”
“That depends on the club,” I reply simply.
“Ouran High School Host Club. It’s really a nice place.”
I feel something in my mind click, and before I can help it I say, “Yes. I’ll go.”
“Great. Let’s head there together. Ah, and you can call me Yasu-chan.”
“Well, Yasu-chan, you can call me Miyako-chan.”
“Okay, then it’s settled. I hope we become great friends.”
-
The club, it turns out, is the home of seven boys. These boys entertain girls as they come. Three of the boys are first years in my class. They are the Hitachiin twins and Fujioka-san. Two others are second years Kyoya Ootori-sempai and Tamaki Suoh-sempai. The final two are third years Takashi “Mori” Morinozuka-sempai and Mitsukini “Honey” Haninozuka-sempai.
“Let’s sit with the twins since I always visit them,” Yasu-chan says. “Though Tamaki-sempai is good for first-timers, I don’t think you’re the kind to enjoy much flirting. Am I right?”
“Yes, you are,” I admit. “I’m not the best with flirting.”
One of the twins talks about how he saw me at the commoner’s supermarket, and I carry on a conversation with him about why we were there. It turns out he is Koaru, who is actually said to be nicer. By time the club closes, I feel happier.
When I get home, I am greeted by an upset Rima-san. “Where were you, Miyako-sama?”
“I was at a club,” I say with a shrug. “A girl from my class wanted me to check it out.”
“Well, your father called. You have a half hour to change into something nice.”
“Why?”
“It does not matter. Just hurry up and dress.”
So, I do as I am told. I slip into a small black dress and strap on black heels. They always make me taller, which makes me happy since I have a height complex.
I step into the car, my red shoulder-bag in hand. I slip it on and step out of the car once we arrive at a fancy restaurant. We are shown to a table where my father sits with three other people. One is a boy with black hair and brown eyes, and the other two I figure to be his parents.
“Miyako, this is Takahashi Yukio,” my father explains.
“It’s nice to meet you,” I say as I take a seat.
“Same,” Takahashi-san says with a smile.
I look at my father. “So, what is the occasion?”
“The Takahashi family just sign on to partnering with my studio, so I figured we’d celebrate by treating them to dinner.” He smiles at me and whispers, “If all goes well, you will have yourself a fiance.”
“You mean Takahashi Yukio-san?” I ask, my voice also a whisper.
“Yes.”
This is hurtful. I hate the idea of arranged marriages. Even so, I behave myself. I am polite, but I can’t help but withdraw from conversation. They talk about things that bore me. I would much rather talk about video games and the characters of anime, not of business and the voice actors that would work best for an anime.
After dinner, my father seems thoroughly angry as he gets into a car and leaves. I get into the one I came in and look at Rima-san. “What did I do?”
“You were shy as ever,” she explains. “The Takahashi family said they are not interested in a wife who does not force her way into a conversation.”
I roll my eyes. “Whatever. I disliked the idea anyway.”
That night, I sleep with dreams of my old life. Without realizing it, I slip into serenity. My lovely home and large list of pets. My friends laughing around me as I sit down in class. This is serenity.
I am awoken rudely the next morning by Rima-san. “You were not waking up,” she says, worry in her voice. “I was about to call an ambulance.”
“Sorry,” I say as I start to get dressed. “I was having a good dream.”
She sighs and rolls her eyes. “Get to school.”
My class lacks life. One of the twins seems to be in a bad mood, and the other twin is trying hard to cheer him up. Even though we were grouped on projects with Fujioka-san often, I still am unable to tell the two apart. Oh well, nothing to be done. Instead, I decide to ask them.
“Hitachiin-san, is something the matter?” I ask. I feel butterflies in my stomach. I hate talking to people.
“It’s nothing,” he says coldly.
“I’m sorry, Yamamoto-san,” says the other twin. “Koaru’s been like this since we went to dinner last night. We can’t get him to cheer up.”
“Well, I hope you feel happy again,” I say to the grouchy twin. “I really enjoy seeing your smile around the classroom.”
At lunch I decide not to eat. Instead I walk out to the rose garden. Surprise. One of the twins are there.
“Which one are you?” I ask.
“Koaru,” he says simply.
“Ah, sorry. I wasn’t sure. Anyway, I’ll go somewhere else since you’re already here.”
I turn to leave only to have him grab my arm. “Wait, Yamamoto-san. I-I want to talk. Hikaru wouldn’t understand since he’s never been in love. Or at least, been in love and realized it.”
“Oh? Well, then talk away. I’m surprisingly good with advice.”
So he tells me of the girl he likes who he saw with another guy. It was obvious that the guy was up as a fiance option. The girl was participating in conversation and acting happy, and it made Koaru-san happy. But the thing was, he liked the girl and didn’t want to let the guy have her. He couldn’t get the courage to tell her, and he needed a girl’s advice since they were very confusing.
“Well, I think you should tell her that you saw her there,” I say. “And then ask if they ended up getting engaged. I mean, I was at dinner with a guy who was an option as my fiance. Even so, he rejected me.”
“He did?”
“Yeah. I’m not good at being social. I faked the beginning well enough, but I ended up drifting away near the end.”
A smile lights up his face. “I’m sorry, but that makes me happy.” He walks past me and back to school.
I sigh and shake my head. And then something hits me. “Hitachiin Koaru-san, do you like me?”
He freezes, shakes his head, and says, “Who knows?”
“But why else would you be happy that I got rejected? Only a completely heartless person would be happy unless they liked the person that got rejected.”
“I don’t know what to say to that idea,” he replies simply. “So,” he turns around and looks my directly in the eye, “I’ll do something.”
Then, before I can even blink, his lips are against mine. When he pulls apart, his eyes are filled with tears. “Don’t ever accept someone else.”
I feel my heart flutter, and I say with a smile, “Of course not.” And then I realize why it was I traded in my life. I remember that I had idolized the show and Koaru. He was the nicer twin and I found myself one of his many fans. Without realizing it, I had forgotten it and lived a life where I ignored him. I wouldn’t make that mistake again.
I have my new Serenity...
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